It's All About the Benji, Baby...

Benji update! Our sweet little 6lb 4oz peanut, is now a whopping 14.6lb OX, who is an absolute JOY!

Some photos...for fun!

More Moby

I seriously cannot say enough good things about this. I hate that I never took the opportunity to "babywear" with my other boys...I've had my Moby for three days and it's been an amazing thing thus far!

Just wanted to share some more pics of me with my boy...he can be SO fussy and calms right down when placed in the cradle hold in the Moby. New moms...you must try it!!



Hands Free!!! I chopped veggies for our dinner today while wearing my buddy...




Comfy for me and for him...

Stuff and Things.

Well, I took the plunge...yesterday, I had my tubes tied! Yes...I know it's cheaper, easier, smoother recovery, etc. for the man just to get the snip, BUT, from what I know of guys and their balls...no way was I going to try to force the man to let someone near his with a scissors! LOL!

So, I did it. Surgery went okay, recovery is going smoothly I suppose. I'm sore...bruised and ready to feel back to normal, but enjoying my week off of work and getting to spend more time with the kids. OH, how I wish I could be a stay at home mom...some day!!

So I made beef stew today...yummy! (Recipe: here ), have been taking care of a sick Luc (poor buddy has a bad headache that has woken him up crying several times...I hope he isn't a migraine sufferer like my brother, mom and I...), and just making the most of my time at home. (As much as I can anyway...I'm pretty slow moving with the soreness.)

I got a MOBY wrap today though! I'm still learning how to wrap/tie it but even with my painful incisions, I could comfortably wear Benji...AMAZING! I wish I had one of these for all my kids...or even had one earlier with Benj. I've been having a really hard time lately coming to terms, not so much with the fact that I won't have any more kids, but more with the fact that I won't ever have an 8 week old again...or a 9 week old...or a 10 week old...if that makes sense? I am hating having to go back to work, so I am trying to cherish every second I can with Benj as a baby...and having the Moby wrap will allow me to still be productive while keeping him close to me when I am home. :)

Anywho...some quick pics to share...

Veggies ready for sauteing...and a bowl of beef stew! (Seriously, check out the recipe! So delish!)



And me snuggled up with my boy! <3



xoxo

3/4's of my Buddies...

Just wanted to share some new pics of 3 of my 4 boys...

Luc and Mikey


And again...


Luc...


Mike...


And brand new from this morning...Mr. Benji. His onesie says "Mommy Thinks I'm Cool". Yes, Benji...I sure do! :)


I hope everyone has a fantastic Labor Day weekend! I, for one, intend to enjoy mine immensely as it is my last weekend before my return to work after maternity leave. **sigh** :(

Talk soon!
xoxo

Photo Recap...

I've been a bad blogger, and I know this. Hoping to make up for it with some photos of my lovey?!?!

I have been with and without my computer/photoshop on and off since our hospital stay! I still don't have MY computer actually...but I DO have photoshop on the man's computer...good enough for me, I say!

So I'm catching up on some long overdue photo uploading!

For your viewing enjoyment...

Still in the hospital:





It KILLS me that I cannot remember his face being this tiny...OMG! How could I have forgotten ALREADY!??!?! **sigh** :(


More recent...

My little "old man" (with his "GIANT" face!)...hahaha:


Momma and the man of many chins...

Ahh...when it rains it pours.

Mr. Benji is hanging in there. Looking good, eating well, temp is up, he's content and sweet and I am officially smitten and in love with my sweet little boy.

On a non-Benji related note, we've been dealt some other devastating news, that I can't get into right now, but I will say, last night was rough. When it rains, it pours.

But, you know what? This morning as I type with a snoozing baby on my lap and gorgeous sunlight filtering in through the blinds, I don't care. I've got a family I love. I've got a sick little boy who needs his mommy to be at her best to take care of him. And three little boys at home missing their momma like crazy.

My family needs me to be at my best...**I** need me to be at my best. Taking care of them makes ME feel better too. So that is where my focus will lie. On getting our sick boy better so we can get him home to his brothers. In order to regain some sense of normalcy, I've got to fight for my family and our well-being...so that is what I will do.

Will keep you posted on the little man...

How Do Mom's Do This?

This is tougher than I ever could've imagined. The ups and downs of this hospital stay have been intense, and I am feeling myself...my mood, my personality, etc...slip further and further away. I'm not trying to sound melodramatic here, and I apologize if it's coming across that way. I just need to vent I guess.

I realize there are sweet, sick babies in far worse condition than our little Benji. We still get to have him in our room most of the time. He acts and seems healthy, minus the IV as a constant reminder that he's not. Every blood test/culture he's had since the initial positive has come back negative and clear. He eats well. He maintains his temperature well. (Although those two things seem to change...one day he'll be doing great and the next he's back in the nursery under the warmers because of low temps. Again...ups and downs.) But Benji has an elevated CRP level. CRP is C Reactive Protein...it's a marker, kind of like white blood cell count. Completely non-specific. All we know is that something is wrong. His CRP is not only elevated...it's HIGHER than the last time they checked it. And we have absolutely no idea why.

Yesterday they took his IV out and told us they'd check his blood one more time in the morning and that in all likelihood we'd be going home. Now, yes, they probably shouldn't have said that...but he's been doing so well! But a visit from the pediatrician proved dissapointing this morning...he's here and we don't know for how long. The immediate thought is finish out a 5 day course of antibiotics and retest him then. If it's still elevated, we go from there.

Of course, as a mom...especially a mom prone to worry more than some...my mind runs this gamut of all of the things that could possibly be wrong to elevate that count. There is no "infection"...so what else could be elevating that count? Something is obviously wrong with my baby.

I'm stressed. I'm scared. I'm sad. I am sick, sick, sick of being in this hospital (but I left yesterday and that was way more stressful for me than being here). I miss my other kids and my house and my dogs, but the thought of leaving my baby here for even a minute just breaks my heart. I feel so torn...not knowing what to think. What to do.

Again, I realize there are babies and families dealing with far worse situations which makes me feel guilty for complaining. I feel guilty when I am crabby towards family and friends that want to visit and I just feel like I can't be upbeat and cheerful. I feel guilty that I can't make my sick baby better. I feel guilty that I have felt jealousy towards other moms/babies who were discharged together from the hospital since we've been here. That is unlike me...like I said, I'm losing sight of myself and I don't really know what to do about it.

Anyway...sorry for the "Debbie Downer" post this morning. I just needed to vent how I'm feeling somewhere, and here's as good a place as any, right? I am just having a hard time with the constant wondering and worrying.

(And if any readers have any information on or experience with elevated CRP levels, please let me know.)

I will keep you all posted on how he's doing.

Our Beautiful Baby Boy

Benji Riott was born 7/15 at 36 weeks, weighing a tiny (to me...remember, I have big babies) 6lbs 4oz. He is 18 1/2 inches long and has a full head of hair. My water had broken two days earlier.

He came out struggling to breathe...but after an hour in an oxygen hood, self-corrected and was doing fine. He was spending a lot of time under warming lamps trying to help him learn to self-regulate his body temperature and was doing great this morning. We had him all day in our room, only to learn this afternoon that after finding out I was Group B Strep positive, they rechecked his blood cultures and discovered bacteria growth.

He is now on IV antibiotics and has received several sticks and a spinal tap. :( He's looking at a long-ish hospital stay and I am crushed at the thought of being discharged without him tomorrow. :(

I will post a full birth story when I am in a better mental state (I'm super sad and worried about the infection...) but wanted to update everyone and let you know he's here!

Here's just one pic from here at the hospital, on his birthday with his Daddy.

36 weeks today and feeling it!

I've been SO sleepy lately! I don't know if it's because it's hot out or what, but I'm TIRED, and ready to be DONE!!!

Only one more week until I'm considered full term (and I had both Luc and Mikey at 37 weeks!!). It is just crazy to me to think the little man (yes, he's still nameless) could really be here any day! Exciting though...I can't wait to meet him! :) (And to be done being pregnant FOREVER! LOL!)

The kids and I are hoping to squeeze in a couple more projects before he gets here, but we'll see how things play out! And SOON, we will have lots of photos to share of our bedroom makeovers! We moved to another bedroom, and are moving the kids around to different rooms, so as those moves are finished up and the rooms decorated, I will be sure to share photos! It is an exciting and busy time in our lives right now!!

Beyond all that, not much else to update on...just busy with life, getting ready for the little guy, and working on the barrage of senior photo sessions I feel lucky to have been hit with this summer! (Sneak Peeks and Specials on my other blog...link in the side bar!)

Anywho...talk soon!

xoxo

32 Weeks Down...hopefully only 5 or so more to go!

OMG! 32 weeks today!!! I can't believe how close we are!

I've been in major nesting mode lately and have had to force myself to slow down and take it easy or my SPD really acts up. I've got our hospital bag PARTIALLY packed. Baby clothes are washed and folded.

We've got a busy couple of weeks coming up...my JENNAPALOOZA (birthday extravaganza!!) is this weekend! Exciting! And our BaByQ (Baby BBQ...get it??) is next weekend! I can't wait!!! Should make time fly by!

I have an appointment this Thursday (my birthday!) so I will update if I have any new or exciting news! :)

23 Weeks...and Projects Coming Up!

I'm giving the 23 Week Update a couple days early...technically, I'm not 23 weeks until Tuesday.

I've been having some pretty severe pelvic pain (as in, pain actually IN the bone...or so it feels like) so I will be making an OB appointment for this week, and hopefully they can do something for me. I talked to the nurse last week and she thought it was probably round ligament pain. I've done this a few times though, and know round ligament pain when I feel it. (Although, I will say I have noticed much more round ligament pain this time than with the other pregnancies.) This is different, new to me, and not "normal". Standing or walking for extended periods of time is getting harder and harder, so that's not fun. I've done some research on what the problem could be...but I'll wait until I see the doctor and see what he says.

On a happy note, little Mister Man has been squirming and kicking up a storm! That is fun for his older brothers who have been able to feel his kicks! :)

According to baby center, little dude is almost a foot long and is starting to recognize loud noises that we hear often...like the dogs barking (or dirt bikes!!) Fun!

On NON-baby notes...RUMMAGE SALE SEASON has begun!! (Ok...I guess that's baby related too because I'm always on the lookout for cute clothes and great deals on baby stuff!) The man and I hate a few around town this past weekend and scored a chest freezer (which we NEEDED) for $25!! Nice!! AND, this was our first time yard sale-ing in our new MINIVAN!! That's right...I've crossed over to the dark side, and I'm loving every minute of it! :)

As for upcoming projects, as promised, we'll be starting the kids rooms soon and will have lots to share on our progress! I've been researching lots and am excited to start some canvas art for their rooms!! I also want to make a weekly menu board...just something to keep myself organized, and the family informed of what momma will be serving up that week! Those are the couple things close on horizon, so be watching for those. OH! And I will have a new recipe to share this week...YUMMY!

Alrighty folks...I gotta try to get some sleep. (Getting harder and harder these days...)

Ciao,

Loving Life & a 21 Week Update

Quick pregnancy update...things are going well. I'm measuring right on target. Not gaining ANY weight, which is fine by me as long as our baby BOY is healthy! Yep...I am soon to be the mom of FOUR boys! Love it! I'm feeling better (minus a punishing UTI I'm dealing with right now) and baby is rocking out, kicking up a storm in my ever-expanding belly!

PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!! We have SO much on the horizon!!

I've found a project I am including the kiddos on that I cannot WAIT to try! We are going to make onesies for our baby BOY, due August 10th! Now that I am finally feeling better after what seemed like NEVER-ENDING "morning" sickness. I can cook again...and clean...and CRAFT! Yay!

So I will be much more present, now! Spring is in the air...which always invigorates my heart! I've got photography work going on which makes me happy. The baby is seeming more real to the kids now that I'm getting a big belly and since we found out it's a boy! I just feel so much more like myself! Ahhh...bliss!

Now that I'm back COOKING up a storm, you can be expecting more new recipe posts! (And this is a long way off, but I am very much looking forward to trying something new...making our own baby food!)

We've got LOTS of home renovations going on too...we're doing some bedroom swapping, and all the kids (and the man and I) will be shifted around and in new and improved rooms! Lots of fun...and lots to post about!

Ahhh...I am feeling GOOD about life today! Love days like that! Back tomorrow with my son William's favorite dish to post about...SUPER EASY "Half-Homemade" Chicken Enchiladas!! Yummy!!

xoxo

Knocked Up

(That post title was for you mom...you know I love ya! *wink*)

Just thought I'd share a quick pic...my buddy Luc took this for me. After every press of the shutter button he'd look at the LCD screen on that back of the camera and go "Ooo...that turned out nice!" LOL! My little photographer...

Anywho, this is a couple weeks old now, but here I am...getting bigger by the day! :)

Pregnancy Update - 17 Weeks!

Inching closer...17 weeks today!!

Baby's skeleton is turning from cartilage to bone now...hopefully he (or she) will have nice strong bones so our mini-MX'er isn't prone to breaks later in life!!! Daddy's broken a collar bone and a toe (inevitable with his sport of choice) and I've broken my foot (because I'm a klutz) so I suppose we're not TOO terribly accident-prone! We're big milk drinkers so that should help, too, I suppose! :)

This weeks "produce" comparison?? TURNIP...baby weighs about as much as a turnip. I'm not much of a turnip eater myself but I carved one like a jack-o-lantern once (it's tough...I don't reccommend it), so I'm familiar with the size/weight.

Not TOO much changing around here...I'm feeling more frequent movement lately, so that's exciting! I can't wait until the man can feel it! I am anxiously awaiting my ultrasound appt. in a couple weeks!! Then we can start shopping! We have NO baby stuff left, so we're starting over...I have found two cribs I like but want to wait to see if we're having a boy or girl first to decide which to get. And then there's wall paint, bedding, toys, clothes, diapers, ohhhhhhh...sooo much to buy!!! Scary!!

We're having a "Baby Bash" this summer though...a Co-Ed "baby shower" thrown by my cousin, that's mostly going to be just a big party to celebrate...we'll have a BBQ and yard games. More on that later... ;)

ANYWHO...gotta run. Much to do!

xoxo

16 week Appt. Update

I had my 16 week appt. yesterday! Heard a good strong heartbeat (135-ish). Scheduled my ultrasound for the end of this month (I CAN'T WAIT!!) I have gained NO weight, so he said from here on out, he expects to see steady weight gain so I need to snack more...I giggled..."I don't think THAT is the problem". So he clarified..."Snack more on protein". Bah.

He said the light-headedness I've been experiencing is from low blood sugar. (Again, fix, with more protein.)

I have been diagnosed with pregnancy induced carpal tunnel in one hand...so I have to brace my wrist while typing which is taking some serious getting used to...but if it helps the burning pain, then I'm all for it! :)

AND...that's about it I think! Overall a nice, quick appointment! I go back at the end of the month for my 20 week!

Pregnancy Update - 16 Weeks

Me and the "Avocado" (size-wise) baby are hanging in there. :) His (her?) little heart is working, working, working...s/he's growing toenails...swimming around. :) Only about a month until our BIG ultrasound!! I can't wait!

I'm doing alright...nausea is lessening (what a RELIEF) but not gone yet. I've been feeling ridiculously short of breath (which I remember very clearly from being pregnant with my Luc). It's not even when I'm exerting myself...just sitting at my desk or on the couch. Not alarming...just uncomfortable. I feel like I "look" more pregnant every day...I'm even going maternity clothes shopping this weekend! (And I might have to buy just ONE little gender neutral baby SOMETHING!) ;)

And that is about it on the pregnancy front. I'm going to start weekly belly pictures soon...around 20 weeks I think. Should be fun! :)

Talk to you soon...
xoxo

Pregnancy Update - 15 Weeks

I know...I know...I don't keep up. I can't keep up. While my weekly update sites no longer make any mention of "morning sickness" or "by now you should start feeling better", I've been left behind in "Feel.Like.Crap.Dom" It's lovely. And I am ready. I am SO very ready, to not feel so sick anymore. :(

BUT...enough complaining, because as I've learned...it doesn't help.

I was 15 weeks last Thursday!! Inching closer to the elusive tell-all ultrasound! Baby is 4 inches crown-to-rump...approximately the size of an apple. Much easier for me to visualize than "kumquat" or whatever my previous fruit/veggie update was! :) Apparently, I've probably gained five pounds, but I don't weigh myself at home, so I have no idea. I'm definitely "pooching out" in the tummy area though! But anyway, baby is apparently moving around in there (still feeling movement here and there) and can kick and swing his/her arms and legs. Baby can sense light THROUGH my stomach (that weirds me out slightly...LOL!) and is forming tastebuds this week. :)

Like I said...I still feel like crap...getting "fatter" but still don't look truly pregnant, so I'm in this weird awkward in between stage right now. Hopefully in the next couple of weeks the pregnant "look" will be more obvious and I'll feel less self-conscious...we shall see. :)

That's about all I've got.

Until next time...xoxo

Pregnancy - Week 10

I want to start posting weekly updates on myself and the “babycakes”…I will eventually be including frequent photos but definitely not yet. ;-)

So I’m in week 10 (my weeks actually change on Thursday…so this Thursday will start Week 11, but it’s easier for me to update on Sunday or Monday so that’s the plan for now…dig it?)

Apparently the baby is the size of a “kumquat”. I can HONESTLY say I’ve never in my life seen a kumquat, but it’s bigger than last week which was “small plum”. He or she is growing really fast right now and I am looking forward to looking pregnant instead of fat and bloated. :)

I’m still feeling sick more often than not, but I do have “good” days where I can actually make dinner or do ONE load of laundry before falling back onto the couch moaning and sick. I am definitely ready to be feeling better. I know that generally that takes place around the end of the first trimester, which is in a couple weeks for me, BUT, I also know (from experience) that it’s not like I’m going to wake up Thursday a couple weeks from now and magically feel better. Hopefully, though, a little bit at a time I will improve and can get back to feeling like myself again.

I’m on a cloth diaper kick right now and trying to talk the man into jumping on board (so far he’s pretty adamantly against it…I’m holding out hope though…) and reading as much as I can on the subject. I’m also REALLY anxious to get our new master bedroom finished, get the boys into their new room, finish Will’s and McKenzie’s beds/rooms…and then wait impatiently until the big ultrasound to find out who gets to share a room with the new baby!

OH…and we got a new puppy. (Yes…I am indeed crazy. How’d you guess?) He’s a Chihuahua/Yorkie mix ( Chorkie?? Yorkie-huahua??) He is the CUTEST thing I’ve ever seen…now if he could just stop peeing on the floor we’d be all set! :)

Ok…that’s about it for now. Nothing else new on the home front. I’m not feeling well enough to be doing any new (or finishing any old) projects, but soon I hope! Oh, and I do have a new recipe to share soon. The family LOVED it…but I’m so turned off by the thought of food right this second, that the thought of typing any more about it is going to make me gag, so that’s going to have to wait.

xoxo

Update

I am still feeling SO very unwell, so for now, posting will remain scarce. I've got my confirmed due date now...August 12th! So hopefully I'm only a month or so away from feeling MUCH better! (PLEASE keep your fingers crossed for me!)

Miss my blog... :( **sigh**

"I'll be back...don't ya worry" (Quote from an old video game I used to be BIG into! Whatever happened to Oddworld games...they were my FAVE!)

Anywho...miss ya!

SURPRISE!!

Alright...it's time to spill the beans. (Better late than never, right?)

So the big news IS...

We're having a BABY!

That's right...the man (Adam) and I are expecting our first child together!!! :) It was definitely an unexpected surprise, but we're happy and excited to be having our first (and LAST) baby together. If you're a regular reader, you'll remember that I currently have three sons and he has one daughter, so this will be our full house. NO MORE! LOL!

Soooo...now you maybe understand why I've been scarce with my posting. I've been SO sick and miserable...it's hard to motivate myself to do much of anything. But once I'm through this stage, I'm sure I'll be back posting full force! And you can fully expect more "parenting" focused posts, due to that consuming a lot of my mind lately!

So anyway, SURPRISE! Now you know!